[naughty roulette]Drunk Uncle Self Care: Debating Timeless Hip-Hop To Cope With Trauma
2021-08-06 16:53:49

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  This started off as another critique of white audacity, hypocrisy and violence. A month or so ago I started writing a piece entitled “Comply or Die.” I didn’t finish it. Everything I attempted to write after was left incomplete. It wasn’t due to writer’s block – it was due to disgust.

  As crimes against humanity skyrocket, the chronic trauma causes resting screwface. Their words are no longer cloaked in differences of opinions or ideology. We know what this is: Truly “supreme” people wouldn’t have to work so hard to suppress evidence of their consistent acts of oppression. The deflection is to debate about 1619 but it’s really about 2045.

  They’re trapped in a history too entangled with our flesh and blood to deny social theories of relativity. DNA evidence is everywhere and totally contradicting their declarations of isolated happenstance. The body cams aren’t matching the police reports. Unearthed mass graves aren’t matching the body count in old news clippings. They no longer control the narrative so they’re muting mics and passing legislation to prevent critical thought of historical facts. This country is one big crime scene and they’ve been trying to cover it up since 1776.

  Recessive gene paranoia got them taking irrational desperate measures. Instead of maintaining an illusion of integrity while fixing the fight for an imperfect union behind the scenes, they’re simply choosing violence. In a country which Black Republican Sen. Tim Scott claims isn’t racist, what is the message of the Emmitt Till Anti-Lynching Act stalling in the Senate? They’re basically trying to unofficially deputize lynch mobs (that will eat their own) and create legal loopholes to justify vehicular homicide of protestors; well, at least the ones they deem support progressive liberal values. At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a volunteer militia Facebook group called Auxiliary Gestapo started by police and funded by the white wife of a Black Supreme Court Justice.

  While they get mad at cries to “defund the police” their economic anxiety would rather let victim settlements bankrupt a city before changing qualified immunity. Look at all these slave catchers fearing for their lives when Black and brown people blink, but just last week they let two white kids (who look like an adolescent version of Justin & Hailey Bieber) shoot at them with an assorted arsenal for over 30 minutes. Yeah, of course, they were arrested alive. One officer even called the girl “sweetie” while tending to her wounds. You think that would happen if the girl was Black?

  Since we know the answer, our auto-reply is to hashtag Tamir Rice. Meanwhile, we forget our trending protest is most likely causing additional trauma to his mother and family. Not to mention the guilt and insult that comes with not listing John Crawford and all the others who died holding a toy gun, cell phone or sandwich. Same story, different Black life taken. That’s why, for us, the short film, “Two Distant Strangers,” didn’t feel fictional. In some ways, it was sanitized for viewers’ discretion. I imagine the director’s cut would include unbearable screams from Carter’s mother as we writers self-plagiarize film reviews for a story that ends the same, but somehow never ends.

  From Ramsey Orta to Darnella Frazier, acknowledging cinematographers usually leads to more police harassment. The state-sanctioned show is always renewed for another season and there is no pause button for us. Notification settings only allow for the option of nightmares deferred. And still, I scroll, bypassing videos of terror to the sensory overload of people escaping pain by posting alleged joy.

  That’s when I noticed it was Black Music Month and decided to use it as an excuse to make a list under the guise of an editorial. One thing’s for certain, two things for sure – taxes and no matter how many Black people face unjust death during the week, during the weekend there will be backyard barbecues across America with drunk uncles debating hip-hop. Since being Gen X places me in that avuncular age group and since we’re approaching a summer of vaccination roulette with family, I figure I’d too choose violence and increase the Black-on-Black crime rate with my curated list of timeless hip-hop songs.

  CRITERIA: Nostalgic, influential, iconic songs that cause reflexive head-bop, body-rock, goosebumps and/or the urge to recite the lyrics with early LL “I’m Bad” energy. The songs also must have the universal appeal that makes it undeniable to a 21st-century audience so they know to like it, learn it and respect it – or else they ain’t getting a plate.

  Nicole & DJ Khaled's Birthday Celebration With Haute Living And Roger DubuisNicole & DJ Khaled's Birthday Celebration With Haute Living And Roger Dubuis

  Speaking of drunk uncles… | Source: Romain Maurice / Getty

  And it goes a little something like this:

  Summertime -Fresh Prince and DJ Jazzy Jeff

  Back That Azz Up – Juvenile, Lil Wayne, Mannie Fresh

  Rapper’s Delight – Sugar Hill Gang

  La-Di-Da-Di – Slick Rick & Doug E. Fresh

  Nuthin But A G Thang – Dr Dre, Snoop Dogg

  Top Billin – Audio Two

  Shook Ones Part II – Mobb Deep

  Dreams & Nightmares – Meek Mill

  It Was A Good Day – Ice Cube

  The Message – Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five

  Eric B. For President – Eric B. & Rakim

  It Takes Two – Rob Base & DJ EZ Rock

  In Da Club – 50 Cent

  Juicy – The Notorious?B.I.G

  Drop It Like It’s Hot – Snoop Dogg

  It’s All About The Benjamins – Puff Daddy & The Family

  Ni**as In Paris – Jay-Z, Kanye West

  Electric Relaxation – A Tribe Called Quest

  I Get Around – Tupac

  Beautiful – Snoop Dogg

  Ruff Ryders Anthem – DMX

  The Bridge Is Over – Boogie Down Productions

  Sucker MC’s – Run DMC

  Paid In Full – Eric B. & Rakim

  California Love – 2Pac, Dr. Dre

  Put Your Hands Where My Eyes Could See – Busta Rhymes

  Fuck Tha Police – N.W.A

  Fight the Power – Public Enemy

  Knuck If You Buck – Crime Mob

  Pop That – French Montana, Rick Ross, Drake, Lil Wayne

  Ante Up (Remix) – M.O.P. Busta Rhymes, Remy Ma, Teflon

  Lean Back – Fat Joe, Remy Ma

  C.R.E.A.M. – Wu-Tang Clan

  Int’l Players Anthem – UGK, Outkast

  What We Do – Freeway ft. Jay-Z, Beanie Sigel

  Hot?in Herre – Nelly

  Doin It – LL Cool J

  Alright – Kendrick Lamar

  Children’s Story – Slick Rick

  Scenario – A Tribe Called Quest

  The World Is Yours/If I Ruled the World (interchangeable) – Nas

  They Reminisce Over You (T.R.O.Y) – Pete Rock & C.L. Smooth

  Sky’s The Limit/ 10 Crack Commandments (interchangeable)

  93 ‘Til?Infinity Souls of Mischief

  Mass Appeal – Gangstarr

  Passin’ Me By – The Pharcyde

  We Gonna Make It – Jadakiss, Styles P

  B.M.F – Rick Ross, Styles P

  Party Up – DMX

  Luchini AKA This Is It – Camp Lo

  Push It – Salt N Pepa

  Work It – Missy Elliot

  All I Need To Get By – Method Man, Mary J. Blige

  Gold Digger – Kanye West

  I Just Wanna Luv U – Jay-Z

  Blow the Whistle – Too $hort

  I Got It Made – Special Ed

  Ain’t No Half Steppin – Big Daddy Kane

  Gin N Juice – Snoop Dogg

  Why You Wanna – T.I

  Still Not A Player – Big Pun ft Joe

  Whoa – Black Rob

  Bad & Boujee – Migos

  Started From the Bottom – Drake

  Sicko Mode – Travis Scott, Drake

  Da Rockwilder – Method Man & Redman

  O.P.P. – Naughty By Nature

  Jump Around – House Of Pain

  Humpty Dance – Digital Underground

  Baby Got Back – Sir Mix-A-Lot

  All I Do Is Win – DJ Khaled

  Swag Surfin’ – F.L.Y (Fast Life Yungstaz)

  Hot N*gga – Bobby Shmurda

  Oh Boy – Cam’ron ft Juelz Santana

  We Fly High – Jim Jones

  Mind Playing Tricks On Me – Geto Boys

  You Gots To Chill – EPMD

  Lovers & Friends – Lil Jon, Ludacris, Usher

  I Got 5 On It – Luniz

  Got Your Money – Ol’ Dirty Bastard

  Birthday Song – 2Chainz, Kanye West

  I Don’t F-ck With You – Big Sean, E-40

  Dance (A$$) – Big Sean, Nicki Minaj

  Tipsy – J-Kwon

  Stay Fly – Three 6 Mafia, Young Buck, 8Ball, MJG

  Nann – Trick Daddy, Trina

  Next Episode – Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg, Kurupt, Nate Dogg

  How We Do – The Game, 50 Cent

  Grindin – Clipse

  Cut It – O.T. Genasis, Young Dolph

  Rack City/Taste (Interchangeable) – Tyga

  Hip Hop – Dead Prez

  Yup – E-40

  How many is that? I’m drunk…

  …I think 93. What 7 would you add to complete the Timeless Hip-Hop 100 List?

  Feel free to make your own list and get@me on Twitter — but in the words of Lil Duval “I ain’t goin back and forth with you…”

  #Smile #TimelessHipHopList #DrunkUncleSelfCare #BlackMusicMonth

  Trevor is a creative mercenary and ethical lobbyist born and raised on Beale Street. Follow him on Twitter?@trevbetter.


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